BOBBY: Dad! Dad! I finally picked out a fursona! It's-
HANK: Is it a real animal?
HANK: Come on, Bobby, we talked about this. Everyone thinks Dale's a jackass with his closed species.
HANK: If you make your fursona a pokemon, where are you gonna be in a few years when the next big fad comes around?
BOBBY: Then I'll just get a new one.
HANK: Bobby, a fursona isn't just something you throw away when something new comes along. It's a piece of yourself. Why, I've had Lyndon here for thirty years.
BOBBY: Here comes the ref sheet.
HANK: (takes a folded up piece of paper out of his wallet. his fursona is a jacked as hell bloodhound)
*disgusted hank hill voice* lucario
Peggy would have to be an owl, right? that's the most stereotypically "smart" animal
*regular hank hill voice* kemonomimi
mike judge get on cameo so I can pay you to talk about my fursona in your hank hill voice
"I don't like that Grace girl walkin' around here with her fursona. Skunks are pests, you shouldn't be dressin' up like one where kids can see. What if Bobby saw?"
"What if he gets the wrong idea and hugs a real skunk? She's not the one giving him the tomato juice bath."
HANK, distraught: Oh, God, I was born in New York! My fursona is a fraud! I'll have to get a pigeon, Peggy! A rat with wings, that's what I am!
PEGGY: I don't know, it'd be kinda romantic if we were both birds. Me, the uptown owl and you, the downtown pigeon. We could soar through the sky and-
HANK: (withering glare)
PEGGY: Alright, alright, jeez
this one was @email@example.com 's idea
HANK, looking at the pigeon sona he just drew for himself: *sobbing*
HANK, squeezing his wife around the waist: I don't call 'er Peg for nothing
Khan: Big, fearsome tiger
Connie: Khan wants her to be a songbird, she wants to be a dragon
Minh: I want to say also dragon
peggy: this is a very important time in bobby's life and i don't think we should stifle him.
hank: peggy, the boy's a sparkledog! next thing you know he's gonna be getting candygore commissions from the sickly lookin fella who works at the get in get out across from sugarfoot's. is that what you want?
peggy, looking away: no i do not,
Bobby finds all the commissions his dad has had since the 1980s in a locked box and assumes he's a rich miser.
He gets a hold of Hank's PayPal and buys himself a full suit and some expensive comms.
Hank reveals he drew most of the art and the actual family commission budget is all from him drawing on the side.
They cancel the comms Bobby ordered but let him keep a partial suit that already came in the mail.
@BestGirlGrace This is the best thread I have ever seen in my entire fucking life
@Colophonscrawl Thank you, it's a classic <3
@BestGirlGrace Makes sense.
I say Bill has the most OCs. He's probably Hank's best customer.
@LexYeen Bill absolutely has a new sona every six months or so.
"Hank! Hank! I got a new sona!"
"Dammit, Bill, what happened to the last one?"
"Oh, I just wasn't feeling Plarina. But the new guy, he's an eagle, and..."
"Usual fee first, talk after."
@BestGirlGrace i cant fucking handle this thread
@BestGirlGrace Ah, this is the wholesome family fun part of the furry fandom.
These are great
@BestGirlGrace GRACE NO
@Aleums it's too late for me, the pact is sealed
@BestGirlGrace seriously though this thread owns
@Aleums Thank you! It's one of the classics.
@BestGirlGrace I’m not sure what emotion this post is making me feel but whatever it is, im okay with it
i love and hate this, thank you for these threads
@KitRedgrave Happy to help!
I must be old I have absolutely no idea what this is.
@BestGirlGrace i am READING THIS IN THEIR VOICES HOLY FUCK
@BestGirlGrace I can hear all this in the characters' voices
@BestGirlGrace What closed fursona species was Bobby choosing?
@violet I think Bobby wanted to be a dragon or a griffon or something, tbh
Don't let the name fool you. All the pornography here is legal, and much of it is hand-written. No fascists, no bigots.